A Dog's Life
[Me walking to front door]
DAWG: Where you going? Where you going? Where you going?
ME: I'll be right back.
DAWG: Can I come? Please? Let me come! Don't leave me!
ME: I'm just going to check the mail.
DAWG: Why are you leaving me?
ME: I will be right back. It's only fifty feet away.
DAWG: Don't go! Please don't go!
ME: I won't even be a minute. Stay.
[Me closing the door behind me]
[Me walking down to the mailbox, getting the mail and returning to the door. Sees dog jumping up and down inside]
DAWG: You are back!
ME: I said I would be right back.
DAWG: You were gone soooooo long. I am glad you're back. Play with me. Let me out. Love me. Give me food. Pet me. Here take my rope and play tug-of-war. Aren't I cute? Don't you love me?
ME: Open the wine.