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Spanking the Monkey

Rather than be all “bougie” and travel the world (like so many of his friends), Sock Monkey decided to take a road trip this year. These are his adventures . . .


There was so much to do before he got on the road. Like celebrating MiscellAnnie’s birthday on Friday night. His friends, from Houston (JuneBug and AmyBear) came in to town and they had dinner at one of the local eateries before they returned to Monkey’s pad for a “quick” dip in the pool. Two or three drinks in, they decided to head to a watering hole to quench what was left of their thirst.

As always is the way, when he woke the next morning, Monkey found an assortment of sundry items strewn about, but not the one’s that the girls really needed - the ones they lost and were looking for. Those, it seemed were lost forever. (What do babies and drunk girls have in common? They are always losing their clothes.)

That Saturday morning, Sock Monkey sat around the pool relaxing before heading out to Lake Travis and more celebration with his friends Dr. B and and Not-So-Well-Man (who was suffering from a terrible bout of the Chilean flu.)

They enjoyed the afternoon sun, the pool, the lake, the fine BBQ (Andy Ant’s famous ribs) and the fixin’s that everybody brought along. As the day wore on, he succumbed to temptation and had a couple of Mike’s Hard Lemonades before finally switching to his first love, Jack Daniels.

Sock Monkey called it an early night and was happily ensconced at home on his sofa watching terrible Sci Fi before falling to sleep to the yattering of his friends, Rachel, Ross, Monica, Chandler, Phoebe, and Joey.

Sunday morning, he rose. After a cup of coffee, he had breakfast at Jim’s Diner, ran to the grocery for road trip provisions, then returned to the house to more specifically map out the trip. He knew that there must be a large ball of twine somewhere between his origination point and final destination and he was determined to find it. Sock Monkey adored large balls of twine.

Today, the house sitter was coming and he would have to show her the ropes of what to do around the house while he was away. After that he had more errands in preparation for the trip, and, then, dinner plans with another out of town guest.

Sock Monkey was tired before his vacation began. Still, e looked forward to it with eager anticipation.

Follow the adventures of Sock Monkey in these pages to learn about his Great American Road Trip (2019).

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