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  • mariokiefer

And this is why I drink . . .


[DECEMBER 03]


ME: Here is the Christmas menu that I planned. What do you think?

RIC: Perfect!

ME: Great. I will make the shopping list.

[DECEMBER 05]


RIC: I was thinking that I would like to have something else on Christmas instead of ham.

ME: You already approved the menu.

RIC: I know, but ham is not my favorite.

ME: Ok. What do you want?

RIC: Turkey, I guess.

ME: Ok. Let me re-do the menu.


[15 MINUTES LATER]


ME: [Shows Ric the menu.] How’s this?

RIC: Perfect!

ME: Great. I will make the shopping list.


[DECEMBER 08]


RIC: I was thinking that I would like to have something else on Christmas. I am not a huge fan of turkey and there is always so much left over.

ME: Ok. What do you want instead?

RIC: How about a roast chicken?

ME: That’s not very Christmas-y.

RIC: It’s still poultry - just not turkey.

ME: Duck? Goose? Cornish hens?

RIC No. Roast chicken is best.

ME: Fine. Let me re-do the menu.

[15 MINUTES LATER]

ME: [Shows Ric the menu.] How’s this?

RIC: Perfect!

ME: Great. I will make the shopping list.

[DECEMBER 10]


RIC: I was thinking about it and you are right - roast chicken doesn’t scream Christmas.

ME: So, what do you want now?

RIC: How about beef?

ME: Tenderloin? You know the cost of beef has gone through the roof this year.

RIC: I know, but that’s more in keeping with the tradition.

ME: Ok. Let me re-do the menu.

[15 MINUTES LATER]


ME: [Shows Ric the menu.] How’s this?

RIC: Perfect!

ME: Great. I will make the shopping list.

[DECEMBER 11 - AT THE GROCERY STORE]


RIC: Looking at the price of the beef, maybe you are right.

ME: [wryly] Well, isn’t that a surprise.

RIC: Maybe we should do something else.

ME: What would you like now?

RIC: We could get some noodles . . .

ME: Nope.

RIC: . . . and you could make a sauce.

ME: Not gonna happen

RIC: Maybe a little parmesan.

ME: Uh-uh. No.

RIC: With a side salad.

ME: Christmas is special.

RIC: So’s your spaghetti.

ME: Open the wine.

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