. . . and this is why I drink:
RIC: Let’s have poor man’s spaghetti tonight. Keep it simple.
ME: Ok.
RIC: Just some sausage. Not crumbled sausage, though. Let’s use cut up sausage.
ME: Ok.
RIC: But it needs to be cut up just right. Not big huge chunks. I want it cut very small.
ME: Halved and sliced?
RIC: Smaller.
ME: Sliced then quartered?
RIC: Smaller.
ME: How much smaller? Diced?
RIC: Smaller.
ME: Minced?
RIC: Smaller.
ME: So, crumbled.
RIC: Not crumbled I want it cut.
ME: Open the wine.