Silver Linings Playbook
BY ORDER OF PUBLIC HEALTH
Public Health has determined that the mining and use of silver contributes greatly to the scourge of climate change and, therefore, issues the following order to mitigate its effects on the health and safety of the populace:
Effective midnight, June 11, 2021, clouds will be stripped of their silver linings.
Any such linings in existence shall be replaced with an eco-friendly, biodegradable polymer.
Looking for silver linings thereafter shall be punishable by a fine not to exceed $1,000 and/or one year in jail.
Thank you for your cooperation.