MARIO KIEFER

I have never met another who lied to hide having done the right thing. #SundayTruth

There is no such thing as a devout atheist. #SundayTruth

The warranty will always expire the day before the item breaks down. #SundayTruth

Some of ya’ll need a good a spanking. #SundayTruth

There is no such thing as an unbiased opinion. #SundayTruth

It doesn’t matter how green the banana is when you buy it, it will be brown before you get it home. #SundayTruth

No matter how hard you try to put yourself in another’s shoes, they will never really fit. #SundayTruth

If you cannot spell pneumonia, you won’t find it in the dictionary. #SundayTruth

While easy to be an adult, it's hard to be a grown-up, #SundayTruth

Nobody likes whine with dinner. #SundayTruth

The opposite of progress is Congress. #SundayTruth

No matter how much people deny it, everyone has at least once peed in a pool. #SundayTruth

I have never met anyone who is not open-minded — as long as you agree with them. #SundayTruth

Respect is not a one-way street. #SundayTruth

What people need is good, old-fashioned self-control. #SundayTruth

No amount of burnt sage will fix a broken home. #SundayTruth

If you love something, set it free. It never belonged to you in the first place. #SundayTruth

Alcohol is better than vinegar for getting pickled. #SundayTruth

I am not certain of much, but I am certain of this — only fools proclaim their certainty. #SundayTruth

Time waits for no man. But if a woman is getting ready for a party, it stands still. (If it knows what’s good for it, anyway.) #SundayTruth