MARIO KIEFER

If you rang the doorbell, you really don’t need to knock on the door, too. #PetPeeveThursday

If you need to take your pet chicken with you everywhere you go, you probably shouldn’t be going anywhere. #PetPeeveThursday

COWORKER: If you have to live in Texas, then the only good place to live is Austin. ME: Have you ever been to Texas? COWORKER: No....

All morning long your mouth has been salivating at the thought of eating those leftovers from the other night; the ones you had been...

I don’t have time for all of these impatient people! #PetPeeveThursday

The clerk who cannot make change if the register doesn’t tell him how much to give back. #PetPeeveThursday

I keep seeing these memes on the internet that say nurses and doctors are heroes, grocery store clerks and truckers are heroes, people...

“I can’t tell you, but if you guess . . .” #PetPeeveThursday

When the meal option costs less than buying the sandwich and fries without the soda. #PetPeeveThursday

Don’t ask me what’s happening in the movie if you were too busy talking to watch. #PetPeeveThursday

When there is snow on the ground in Central Texas. #PetPeeveThursday

Person A: Would you rather do x or y? What time? Person B: Yes. Please respond to the question! #PetPeeveThursday

People who say: “I only say this because, as your friend, I’m worried about your health.” Yeah, right. #PetPeeveThursday

Waiting behind another at the stop light for him to finish sending his text before he drives through. Get off the damned phone!...

PHONE: “Ring . . . Ring . . . Ring . . . Ring . . .” ME: “Hello?” PH: [silence] ME: “Hello?” PH: [silence] ME: “Hello?” PH: [silence] If...

I parked at the far end of the parking lot where there were no other cars and lots of empty spaces, so why did you park right next to me?...

Using the “emergency” flashers doesn’t exempt you from the rules about double parking. #PetPeeveThursday

It’s called a “sidewalk”, people, not a “side-stand-and-chat.” #PetPeeveThursday